World of Warcraft and Real Life

In real life i can't really be me. I am different from others so i am treated as such. Growing up those who were my peers decided to call me so many names under the sun that to this day i still sometimes find it hard to not put a hand thru a wall. Two face, Ugly, four eyes, cyclops, freak of nature are some of the names saddled on me. I have Dandy- Walker Syndrome which is your motor skills. I am very blessed even if no one else can see it. I am in the small percent of those with Dandy-Walker to be able to be fully functioning. I also have Hemanijonas which is blood vessels too near to the skin surface.I had a VP-Shunt put into my head 2-6 weeks after i was born then when i was 3 months old i had to get a trachea that i had till i was 3 yrs old. Shocked the hell out of my doctors that i am a natural born swimmer. I am legally blind in my right eye and hard of hearin in my right ear as a result of the hemanijonas attackin those blood vessels. The doctors upon seeing my medical told my parents they didn't expect me to live past one year. Then when i surpassed that they started speculating on it and the last i heard it was 10 yrs old. I am in the year 2012 25 years old and still kicking. The only thing that scares me is knowing my medical and all that can go wrong if the VP-Shunt is left untreated. Oh and needles i HATE needles. If your a nurse please put the nurse in correctly the first time....i dont wanna be in pain the whole time cuz they refuse to take it out and put it in correctly. I have 3 siblings and i grew up in a Military family. My dad served Army and my mom is a nurse. When i was young i knew exactly what i wanted. I wanted to look normal and i didn't stop asking my mom to get me the surgeries i have had laser surgeries. The doctors didnt want to touch me until i was a 16 and my mom talked until they saw it my way. I still dont look normal, but i gave up on tryin to look normal. Even if i look normal it doesnt mean those who shunned me for how i looked on the outside would accept me cuz i look like the norm. I started playing World of Warcraft soon after graduating High School. I had played when i was in High School just on my brother's account, but got really into the game and I still play to this day. I have many friends on the game and im not judged on how i look on the outside im only judged by how well i heal/dps/tank or help others. I'm a kind person and love helping others, but only way i can show it is in the game, at church and to animals. I lost count of how many times adults said "kids can be so cruel" and "oh i was bullied when i was little too" I'm sorry but were you bullied cuz you looked so different from others? My hemanijonas was basically on the right side of my face. People stare at me still to this day and some invade my personal space to stare and some outright ask if i had been in a fire. Then i have to explain "no i was born this way and have been having surgeries to make myself look normal." I play a Pally Verlorenn human lvl 90 my first toon healer/tank. Also i have Beldonna night elf druid lvl 90 healer/boomy. Then Vergessen lvl 85 shammy resto/ele. Midastouch Rogue lvl 80. I get on the game and play to be me. To help others and to let me be me. I drag some friends along with me to pvp or do dungeons or dailies or i just grp them all together for an impromptu raid for some old content. Im always up for helpin others unless im tryin to lvl a toon or profession. When i started playing on Duskwood- yes i know what so many of the community thinks of the realm but idc. I was shy and didnt know how to interact with others when i joined Stormhammers. I didn't really open up to people about real life for a long time. When i said i was going to be offline cuz i was going to the doctors for different things they expressed concern and interest, but didnt push to know. When i opened up and explained my medical a few in guild actually understood to a degree the medical jargon i was using for others i went onto ventrillo and linked them a website so that if they wished to read up on it they could. I had joined Facebook for college and to keep in contact with the few friends i managed to make in the years from elementary to high school. When some of them asked if they could add me i was hesitant at first cuz i didnt want them to think differently of me after seeing how i really looked. Now i cant get them to leave me alone LOL. They are always askin when i say im not feeling well whats going on or what did the dr say. They even follow me around in the game at times just to /kiss /lick /hug /poke me or to just chat in whisper or i group with them and do something. They saw how i look in life and realized that i may look different, but i have a wicked sense of humor and am a wonderful person. Back to being blessed. I am blessed cuz i am able to be fully functional. Whereas most who have Dandy-Walker can't talk,walk,feed their self or do anything. I am also the ONLY one documented with Dandy-Walker, Hemanijonas, and needing a VP-Shunt so early. I'm also the ONLY one in my family to have any of this medical. We don't know what caused my medical or why. I was in speech therapy until 5th grade. Math is hard for me to do Algebra and up. History never really caught my interest and DON'T ask me anything science related cuz i couldn't tell you anything beyond Biology is the study of living things. I was shunned by most of my peers so i found comfort in books. Instead of running around on the playground at recess i was in the library reading a book. I read higher then my grade level. Church, Girl Scouts, Boy Scouts and books kept me from growing bitter and beating against the invisible wall asking "WHY GOD WHY" don't get me wrong i had plenty of days and nights where i came home crying and did ask that and i dont believe i ever have gotten an answer, but it doesn't really matter. I accepted im different from others and i don't put much stock in looks. I judge others by their actions. Looks don't even come into the equation. When you're judged by your looks then you tend to watch actions more. The saying "Don't judge a book by it's cover" is very true. How will you know if you will like someone by just looking at them? or looking at the cover of a book? You never know what you may uncover if you give a person a chance to get to know them before deciding it's not worth it. You see a truck full of redneck hicks with dogs and wonder what kind they are?? Well i go over and ask face to face. Yes i do use some caution, but i would rather show a friendly smile then yell "HEY REDNECK WHAT KIND OF DAWGS YA GOT THERE?" I didn't speak the teen language i don't even understand it so if you read this and actually understand the teen language please pass on the knowledge. If my skin starts to crawl just lookin at someone and they look normal i listen to that feeling....be stupid not to trust my instincts. I went to Girl Scout camp and rode horses or went swimming and was accepted. I also went to Lake Aurora which was a Christian camp. I had so much fun just running around and being a normal kid. No one treating me like a freak or treating me with kid gloves. My favorite part was the blob jumping on it and sending someone flying and then having someone send you flying. Archery was fun too, but not really my thing. I loved the horses and animals. I could talk to them about anything and they loved me unconditionally. They didn't care i looked different. I just gave them attention and gave them some loving. Adults during school watched me closely for the bullying, but also cuz i think some of them couldnt get past the fact i had medical. I have had teachers/counselors try to discourage me from following my dreams. I wouldn't listen to them and if i had my mind set i went ahead and did it. To me instead of lookin at a person's short comings i believe you should first look at the fire within the person. I haven't given up on life and it hasn't been easy to get thru everything, but i have the loving support of my family, my church, my friends both those on World of Warcraft and those i meet in life. Follow your dreams and don't let others put you down. Pick up the books and study your butt off and show those ignoramuses that you are smarter and that you will reach whatever goals in life you are going for. To let others dictate how you live your life is wrong. Live it without regrets. Live one day at a time, but most of all live it to the fullest. If you need to find a safe haven then find something you have fun doing. It doesn't matter from what walk of life you come from or how you look. Be nice to me and i will be nice to you. It's that simple.